#is this... is this what... who...
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Tw: restricted medical diet, missing hunger cues, death, general food and chronic illness stuff. (It's a good post tho)
Being able to eat cereal again has unlocked something actually feral in me. I'm so used to not being able to grab a quick little snack that won't have Medical Consequences later that I've pretty much gotten used to just... turning my hunger cues off and running at a deficit of calories.
It takes me literal hours to eat a bag of crisps because if I don't eke it out, my body will reject it. I can't have most fruits because my body will reject them. Raw vegetables will send me to the ER. All the foods I can eat require labor, either past or present, and when you're already running on a deficit of energy from chronic pain and constant hunger, well, that's easier said than done.
But being able to do something as simple as eating cornflakes, either with or without milk, and not have my body go into an anaphylactic meltdown is... This is game-changing.
When I say it has awoken something feral in me, I'm being literal. It's hunger. I'm feeling hunger, and for the first time in literal years, I'm able to sate it without having to burn up precious energy to do it.
And it's just so achingly normal that it feels like it shouldn't be a big deal. It feels ridiculous to feel tearful over a thing like cornflakes. But when I consider the fact that in 2019, I almost died from malnutrition because my nervous system was shutting down, and I couldn't eat anything because my MCAS was so advanced everything was sending me into anaphylaxis I, I just. Yeah.
Crying over cornflakes on a Monday night.
Just MCAS 'remission' things... ✌
#chronic health tag#MCAS#I'm so scared to say it's in remission#I am so so scared#but it's like#I'm drinking soda#I'm eating packaged foods#and I'm not going into spontaneous anaphylaxis?#like I'm not about to eat any of the foods that I *know* kill me but like...#I'm finally getting over 2000 calories a day for the first time in five years#is this... is this what... who...#*sweats nervously*#and I know recovery is non-linear with shit like this#but at the same time#I am grabbing onto this with both hands and RUNNING with it
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in all timelines in all possibilities only you can show me this
#artists on tumblr#Arcane#jayvik#Jayce Talis#Viktor#arcane spoilers#my art#I saw That Shot (you know the one) and my brain broke with how beautiful it was#and then I was like wait those colors... oh my god what if...#aaaand I've always wanted to draw the klimt kiss ref#looks like these two were the ones who got it in the end hah#but phew this tested me in so many ways with figuring things out
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ao3 is crazy because you'll read the most gut-wrenching 200k word slowburn that leaves you sobbing into your sweater at four in the morning and the author will be applejacksmonstercock
#avey originals#umm how do i tag this#fandomposting#fanfic#house md#harry potter#ao3#marauders#supernatural#doctor who#sherlock#bbc sherlock#nbc hannibal#what r some popular fandoms. umm.#mouthwashing#disco elysium#fallout#gravity falls#hamilton musical#hilson#wolfstar#shitpost#johnlock#destiel#hannigram#heretic#arrowverse#percy jackson#dead poets society#dps
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one time I used the ben affleck smoking reaction image in the family group chat and my mom replied with the funniest possible response which was: "mommy doesn't know who the guy is???" and that phrase has not left my brain since. I'll see blorbos on my dash that I don't recognize and I'll be like well it seems mommy doesn't know who the guy is.
#the funny thing is she DOES know who ben affleck is#mom you're the one who made me watch good will hunting!!!#ah well. mommy doesn't know who the guy is#I'm gonna start saying that as if it's a popular meme phrase that everyone knows. maybe i can gaslight pple into using it#....you know what. please reblog this actually. it's what mommy deserves
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I still think its the funniest shit ever that when I used to volunteer at planned parenthood every week even though I walked past mostly the same protesters every single time they were begging me not to get an abortion theres other options yadda yadda. Like meemaw you see me here every week. They call me abortions georg because I get another one every Monday at 8am
#less fun was the guy who followed me for multiple blocks to the light rail station :/#nothing made me more pro abortion than realizing what freaks anti choice people are
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being a writer leads to a genuinely helpful but also very stupid kind of mindfulness where you'll be having a sobbing breakdown or the worst anxiety attack of your life and think "okay, I really need to pay attention to how this feels. so I can incorporate it into my fanfiction."
#'where are you feeling this stress in your body' is OUT#'what tactile details will allow you to describe how your blorbo is feeling the stress in THEIR body' is in#listen. it works.#anyway guess who's having a terrible anxiety day and about to make it a traumatized mad scientist's problem. this girl.
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I can behave normally around books
#shitpost#anyway guess who brought home 24 new books today?#if you guessed me. well. you would be correct#in my defense I only bought 5#for a combined total of usd#where’d the number go. it was 17 usd#the rest were from me going through what my dad was getting rid of for space and claiming it for myself#but either way#24 in one day is a personal record I think#also I do fully intend to read all of these it’s not hoarding for hoardings sake
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interaction i have with shocking regularity is when someone’s complaining abt someone they know and theyre like “ughh they’re 21 and dont have a job and refuse to learn to drive” and then they remember who they’re talking to (me. 21 cant work cant drive) and go like
#text#‘ur situation is different’ Do u know Their situation enough to say that lol#also like. be srs if u didnt know me ud think the same way abt me. Do u think this abt me subconsciously?? guessing yes#The only person who HASNT made me feel like this and has actually articulated what they meant in a way that didnt feel like a dig#at me was 💫 last night hence why its on my mind
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The way people demonize seagulls is actually unreal. Almost all of their natural habitat has been destroyed (almost all coastal areas have been developed, destroying natural sand dune ecosystems) and they're doing their best to adapt. They're literally just trying to survive. You're in their home. The vitriol some people have for these gorgeous sea birds just because they're not shy about snatching food if you're not cautious is insane
#im malding bc i read an article about some guy who beheaded a seagull for trying to steal his kids french fry#what the fuck is wrong with you
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Sure, you know how to self-flagellate, but do you know how to apologize? Saying "I'm a stupid idiot" is not the same thing as saying "I did something wrong."
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white americans when you tell them that the idea of climate change as an impending disaster is a reductive first world perspective because it’s a tangible reality for many in the global south already:
#climate change#im TIRED#and i’m saying this as someone who also lives in the US.#im glad that none of you have to worry about your family and friends in other countries dying because of the heat#but this idea that “oh we have to stop it before we reach the extreme” is SO STUPID#because it’s already reached the extreme in some places!!#people are dying in south asia. people are dying in southeast asia. people are dying in africa. people are dying in central america.#people are dying in south america. people are dying in island nations.#what will it take you to care about these people#or will you not care until it’s people who look like you who are dying.
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#'who was this about' dont worry <3#EDIT hi i didnt realize this would get notes LOL. um everyone reblog with what character ur thinking of because im NOSEY i WANNA SEE#edit 2 to everyone trying to guess what the character i made this for was. youre all wrong. this was about kamen rider#youd think lupin because of my profile picture but alas i have other interests as well...#anis gaymer moments
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baby animals move like theyre playing a new video game & havent figured out the controls yet
#gray.txt#which i suppose is basically what's happening#<- guy who's only ever played video games experiencing reality for the first time: getting a lot of video games vibes from this
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the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again
#yeehaw#1k#5k#10k#posts that got cursed. blasted. im making these tag updates after... 19 hours?#also i have been told it should say speech loss bc nonverbal specifically refers to the permanent state. did not know that!#unfortunately i fear it is so far past containment that even if i edited it now it would do very little. but noted for future reference#edit 2: nvm enough ppl have come to rb it from me directly that i changed the wording a bit. hopefully this makes sense#also. in case anyone is curious. though i doubt anyone who is commenting these things will check the original tags#1) my friend did not do this on purpose in any way. it was not intended to distract me or to hit on me. im a lesbian hes a gay man. cmon now#he felt very bad about it afterwards. i thought it was hilarious but it was very embarrassed and apologetic#2) “why didn't he use 🫵🏼?” didn't exist yet. “why didn't he use 🆗?” dunno! we'd been using a lot of hand emojis. 👌🏼 is an ok sign#like it makes sense. it was just a silly mixup. also No i did not invent 👉🏼👌🏼 as a gesture meaning sex. do you live under a rock#3) nonspeaking episodes are a recurring thing in my life and have been since i was born. this is not a quirky one-time thing#it is a pervasive issue that is very frustrating to both myself and the people i am trying to communicate with. in which trying to speak is#extremely distressing and causes very genuine anguish. this post is not me making light of it it's just a funny thing that happened once#it's no different than if i post about a funny thing that happened in conjunction w a physical disability. it's just me talking abt my life#i don't mind character tags tho. those can be entertaining. i don't know what any of you are talking about#Except the ppl who have said this is pego/ryu or wang/xian. those people i understand and respect#if you use it as a writing prompt that's fine but send it to me. i want to see it#aaaand i think that's it. everyday im tempted to turn off rbs on it. it hasn't even been a week
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#likedovesdo#blablabla:p#me and who#idk what to tag#i just liked this tweet#acnh#animal crossing#bleh :p
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